You

I don’t know what to say
I look at you
My heart begins to beat faster
My tongue sticks to the back of my throat
I open my mouth, waiting for the words to come out
Those words that come out so easily to everyone
That smile that comes so naturally to everyone.
Except you
Why you? I ask myself
Everyday
Every hour every minute
I’m never alone.
I used to write about you
Without knowing it was you I was writing about.
I used to dream of you
Except I didn’t know it was you I was dreaming about
I wanted you to leave me alone
I tried very hard to tell you I wanted you to leave me alone
Somehow along the line the message must have gotten mixed up
I’m so scared
Scared of you
Scared of me
Scared of us.
Stupid things I’ve done
That I am doing
That I will continue to do in the future
My heart tells me to tell you the truth
You stop me
Your face tells me to go on
Your voice says to keep going
Your head says NO!!!
Who will win?
I don’t know how much more of this I can take
Looking stupid
I’m tired of it
I cry all the time
Not knowing what to do.
God help me
You sure won’t.