Happy

I have had a lovely week and il7imdillah I think things are finally coming together! There was no drama , no one was upset and we're all happy. I am used to my routine here and I'm loving the way my mum depends on me now...Today was hilarious..she and my dad got back late from the"chabra" and she came and sat to chat with us....Usually they would go upstairs and it was our job, the kids , to entertain ourselves with movies, games, whatever...lol she ordered me to shut my comp and focus fully on what they were saying.. Usually i am the chatterbox of the lot and my absence meant that there was a significant silence and lack of laughter :P ehhehehe so I shut the computer and chatted..after an hour lol i said that i needed to go to my room and sleep now..she said no...hehehehehe when were done...let's talk more!!!! hehehe i dont get it all i do is open my eyes wide at the jokes and laugh at what salfa she tells me !! It feel great to be appreciated tho. Ahhh...life is good

Hope

I resolved the issue with one of my close friends today. This proves, contrary to what my mum says that people can change :) I think the best piece of advice anyone's ever given me is that when your friends with someone or in a relationship and you see something you don't like ,,,DON'T GIVE UP ON THEM! Help them to change it and improve and be there for them... This has really changed my outlook and has helped me turn my life around.. Also I have discovered that being passive about most things gets you no where. IT may get you in a good place but maybe not the best place for you. I used to wear whatever perfume I got as a present wore whatever clothes i had around me and chose to hang out with friends that called me. I now make the effort to get to know people i find interesting...i choose my own clothes with my own signature scent and just enjoy life!! lol reading this it really sounds as though i was depressed.. I can't believe i never even noticed :P I used to accept whatever was handed to me and just dealt with it. Whether it was good or bad...I just went with the flow..Thats so not right. The last two months its been like pulling teeth...hard to get by with obstacles at every corner. Yet I'm loving the end re
sult.because I chose here. I am surrounded by products of my own choices and whether good or bad..Its me

Clarity

I feel like I'm finally settling in here. After a couple of months and a lot of drama Im finally beginning to get the hang of being a lady in society in kuwait....There's still some way to go..the art of looking perfect constantly and especially in all those "in"places. It is difficult to have to constantly focus on clothes and being stylish lol I am considering maybe getting a personal stylish I feel like it would be way easier...Having all this free time, though nerve racking in the beginning as I have always had my life planned and busy, has now become very important. I have started to re evaluate the friendships in my life...Why am I friends with these people? Do I actually like them or do they just happen to be there? No wonder I have always been so confused and alone!!! Its good to finally understand the reason why! We actually have nothing in common :( Now that I realise this Im feeling quite satisfied and happy. Though I have no friends in the country I am renewing my relationship with my family and making ties here.. It feels good to finally belong

Neglect

It is an amazing thing what neglect does to people..You know when you see those couples or in families you see people being nasty to one another. I always used to wonder why? Why were they being so mean? There is a reason for it. They have been hurt or neglected....As a group of girls we sit and we discuss things...what has happened and why and we analayse.. We feel soo much better and there is a sense that everything has been resolved and then you can get on with your life....It is very easy to turn into the worst version of yourself...and a horrible thing as well...a person without work and without friends can quickly feel like she is losing her worth and credibility as a person and will begin projecting those thoughts on to other people....it is a horrible thing and not a nice thing to see happen to yourself or other people..And yet what can you do to combat this? I wondered about those mean girls...mean girls however get far in life and get the things they want...i hope at some point in the future justice will be served and that some form of compensation will be given by the universe.....my actual post probably makes no sense to people and yet i feel like i am already relasing some negative thoughts out and away.Hopefully cleansing some inner part of myself and helping me to return to the pleasant person I used to be.

Victory

This week has been extremely interesting. Im feeling way better now lol...the last post was pretty tragic I think...I found out that I was being deceived by someone who I felt was really close to me...They felt they knew what was best for me and went behind my back to do something...its not the end result that bugs me its the deception..why can't you just say no? or say that you dont want to participate iand n this why the elaborate scheme with actors and everything? Is it that difficult to just really talk??Another thing that happened was that another person..this was my best friend has now decided that its best to take the silent harsh ignoring treatment to solve the problem and is now hiding behind other people because she cant talk right now...Sigh I expected more. On a positive not I am feeling soo strong and in control of my life. AFter the deception was discovered I marched up to the authorities in the deal and made it known that I had realised what was going on. Inside I was nervous and shaking. I had spent the whole night thinking up strategies on how to deal with it. should i hire a lawyer? Are there family connections I can use ? ? In the end I just used what I had going for me. Honesty and directness. I spoke to the manager..told him the truth about what happened and thank goodness everything was put right...The mistake sadly came from those who i though I had on my side. ANyhow it feels good to fight for what you want and believe in and in the end achieve your goals. This overshadows the betrayal...as for the best friend scenario...there is nothing i can do for now....she needs to realise that she has to stop trying to have control over everything and trying to control other people....accept ppl the way they are and if you cant just leave them alone. I did it though!!! I went in there and did it!!!I am so proud of myself.

Just be strong

Reading over the posts ive written, I realise that theyre quite sad. Im not usually a sad person....Im the one cracking jokes and cheering people up. this past month has been really difficult...worse and worse things keep happening and im wondering if it will ever stop. Im trying to keep calm and continue day by day trying to ignore the pain in my heart. I need to do something, I need to work, get busy, make it all go away/

!WHY WONT IT GO AWAY

The mojtama3 - our big bad policeman

a"a7na mojtama3na ma yaqbil hal shay" I keep getting told this again and again...the subjects of course range from adoption to the concept of learning how to drive a speedboat in a public place... My question is : who is this mojtama3? and what are his reasons for being so oppressive!!!! I actually believe that the whole concept of mojtama3 is personal to each of us. All of us individual kuwaitis are good people (well im hoping most of us) and to an extent we all believe in open mindness and the right to choose certain things in our life. If the couple next door wanted to adopt a baby i actually would be happy for them....so would everyone I know so why is it such a taboo thing to do? I think each of us has an idea of what is acceptable or not and we label the unacceptable thing "the mojtama3" opinion so as to stop us and people were close to from doing what we think is unnacceptable. Personally I dont think the mojtama3 would mind at all or even care to be honest with you. When dealing with individual people through work I have found that our mojtama3 is kind, thoughtful and very very emotional. So the big bad policeman is a myth. The only thing we are afraid of, is each other